Christmas Grief

“Be merciful to me, O LORD, for I am in distress; my eyes grow weak with sorrow, my soul and my body with grief.”

Psalm 31:9

“My eyes are dim with grief.  I call to you, O LORD, every day; I spread out my hands to you.”

Psalm 88:9

My father died in November many years ago.  I remember being so sad the Christmas following his tragic death.  The grief was so heavy that I felt continuously pressed down.  My exact thoughts as we opened up the presents were “Christmas will never be the same again without Daddy.”  My father and I would play games all day.  He loved to laugh and tell stories.  Now that was all gone.

I was right.  Christmas has never been the same again.  I still miss my father every year, and it has been over a decade.  However, God is so loving to have filled that hole left behind by the loss of my father through other people.  Our family has grown.  My parents have been blessed with ten grandchildren.  I now have a family of my own.

Now, I understand this as a different season in my life.  It is the season to share with my young daughters, husband, sisters as adults, sweet mother (who is now sitting, instead of working!), and precious friends.  Just as my time being young and being able to play with my father all day was limited, so is this time, too.  Believe me, I would have kept Christmas the same way forever and never made room for any new idea or to enjoy Christmas someone else’s way on my own.  Since there is only one of me, I realize that every year I run out of time to spend with the ones I love.  I couldn’t possibly do it all.  I’m enjoying this season of my life while longing for the day that we are all united together once again.  In heaven, we’ll receive our new bodies, and earthly limitations will be gone.  We won’t be spread so thin and constricted by limited time.

The holidays can be a very sad time for some people.  It exposes the emotional buttons that they have desperately tried to hide.  Some people dread the holidays because their loved ones are gone, or maybe they never have had a true loved one to share this time.  Some people are bitter about their families and whine about the dysfunction that they have had to endure.

This Christmas season, I’m asking God for opportunities to reach out to the lonely, the grieving, and the depressed.  I want to have God’s eyes to see those who are grieving and need to know it is okay to miss their loved ones.  When our love outlasts our loved one, we have to realize that it is because our hearts are subject to eternity.  Ecclesiastes 3:11b says, “He has also set eternity in the hearts of men...”  Since lives are changed one person at a time, let’s ask God to give us all at least one person this Christmas season for whom we can make a difference in his or her life.

If you are dealing with grief, then my heart hurts for you.  Know how much I care about you, but more important than me, know that our Sovereign God loves you so much.  He has heard your cries when you thought no one heard.  He understands what it is like for a loved one to die.  Some day, He will wipe away every tear, and you will know eternal joy.  O, how I long for that day!

Pray with me:  O Lord, even when we grieve, give us a heart to praise You!  You hear us when we cry.  You comfort us.  Thank You for our loved ones You have given to us.  This Christmas bring us someone to extend Your loving arms to her or him.  May we be willing to reach out to this person in comfort.  Bring joy back to his or her life that only You can do.  One day, we’ll see You face to face.  Our saved loved ones will all be together.  How we pray for Your Spirit to move over every one of our loved ones so we will all be there together.  It’s in the Name above all names, in Jesus’ Name, Yeshua’s Name, we pray.  Amen.